thoughts of cool Tita Cyn

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Happy 39th Birthday Cindy!!

As part of honoring Cindy on her birthday, a few of us got together for a late lunch, and then drove to visit the cemetery. Arlene, Cyn Cyn and Ava also made a stop at Michael's to get some new flowers.

They ran into some traffic on the way from Michael's to the cemetery, and those of us who went ahead were concerned that the gates would be closed before they arrived. Fortunately, they stayed open just long enough for them to join us for a short prayer and to sing Happy Birthday.

Tita Linda, who's visiting from the Philippines for the holidays, had the lovely idea to put the older flowers around the sides of the tombstone. Some other friend or family member (we're not sure who) had brought a beautiful bouquet of fresh pink flowers too.

I talk to Cyn Cyn and Ava about their Tita Cyn fairly often, letting them know about little things that remind me of her. Specifically this week, there was more than one occasion when the girls and I were rocking out, singing loudly along with the songs playing in the car. I always think of Cindy in those moments, and the girls know it.

Earlier this month, Ava and I were talking about Tita Cyn, and I let her know that they would have gotten along so well, and really would have enjoyed each other. She responded by saying something along the lines of, "Ya, she sounds like she was really cool." And Ava's right!

thoughts of a time saving tip

shared by VJ Rabuy, her sister

I'm visiting a good friend in Long Beach this weekend, and as I was getting ready for bed, I only saw her son's toothbrush by the sink. I asked my friend where her toothbrush was, and she informed me that it was in the shower.

It made me think about when I would visit Cyn when she lived in LA, and I remember that she would keep her toothbrush in the shower too. It is probably a good time saver, and easier because the water is running, to brush your teeth while showering. But it's a practice I have never tried.  

When I think about it, it does make sense. It was cool to discover that my friend and Cyn shared this little quirk.

thoughts of jacque cousteau

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Although it's a little odd with Thanksgiving being early this year, it's one of our family's favorite holidays. We enjoy the restful time away from work and school, and also look forward to yummy Thanksgiving food - Ava likes ham, Cyn Cyn drenches everything in gravy, Andrew loves stuffing and I enjoy sweet potatoes.

Thanksgiving also reminds me of a few traditions that Cindy, my sisters and I shared throughout the years. We always liked watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, especially the big balloons. We also loved watching the classic Peanuts Thanksgiving Special; and more than once we considered having jelly beans, pretzels, toast and popcorn as part of our meal.

Our family has continued both the parade and Peanuts traditions since the girls were young, but have recently added watching Thanksgiving episodes of Friends as another fun tradition. Friends always reminds me of Cindy. The Thanksgiving episodes - especially the one when Rachel makes a trifle and the one with Brad Pitt - are fun to watch anytime of year, but even more so on Thanksgiving.

thoughts of students first!

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

While at UCLA, Cindy served on USAC, the Undergraduate Student Association Council. She was elected to the position of Financial Supports Commissioner. Previous posts have discussed her involvement in USAC, and with several student groups at UCLA.

This election season reminded me of the time we spent campaigning for Cindy when she ran for office. Andrew painted her signboard, and helped with the signboards for several of her friends who were part of her "slate". I know she would have continued her involvement in public policy, and activism within the community, once she finished her degree at UCLA.

Just walking the dog around the neighborhood and seeing all the campaign lawn signs made me reflect on the idea that Cindy could have definitely run for some form of public office at some point after college. I'm a registered voter, and try to stay aware of current events and issues. But I realize now that becoming even more aware, and ideally more active, is yet another way to honor Cindy's memory.

thoughts of sharpie fun

shared by VJ Rabuy, her sister

Cindy liked pens. I don’t know why she liked them so much. But for as long as I can remember, she just did. I know other blog entries have also mentioned her love of pens.

She liked Sharpie brand permanent makers. Both the fine tip and regular size Sharpies specifically state, "not for letter writing"; but I know she used to write letters with them, at least with the fine tip markers.

I was reminded of this the other day when Cyn Cyn was preparing for her volleyball team’s Senior Night, and her teammates were using Sharpies to write messages to the senior players.

I was at the gym watching her game, and Cyn Cyn had brought a set of multi-colored Sharpies, but was disappointed that she didn’t have more dark colors. I just happened to have some Sharpies of different shades of blue with me, and was able to lend them to her team to use.

Maybe when it says "not for letter writing", they mean for letters on thin, regular paper. Sharpies seem to be okay on cards and cardstock. I recently sent out some Halloween cards; and just for fun, I used my orange and black fine tip Sharpie markers. I was channeling my inner Cindy.

thoughts of sharing a name

shared by AR Flanagan, her sister

Whenever I meet someone whose name is Cindy or Cynthia, of course it makes me think of Cindy. Oftentimes, it's just someone I meet in passing, such as a server at a restaurant, or a salesperson at a store. Once I see "Cindy" or "Cynthia" on that person's name tag, it makes me smile, both inside and out.

One recent and reoccurring interaction with a friendly "Cynthia" has been when I have attended A's games at the Oakland Coliseum over the past season. The woman who oversees the parking is named Cynthia. It brightens my day a little each time she greets me. It also turns out that she's a friend of VJ's, so that's a bonus.

I appreciate every instance when I encounter someone named Cindy or Cynthia. And come to think of it, I have never met anyone with that name who I didn't like.

thoughts of friendly reminders

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

I've written a few times before about little, daily occurrences that remind me of Cindy. I consider them her version of a little wink and smile from heaven, just letting me know that she's watching over me and my family.

A few of these happened over the past couple of weeks that just made me stop and smile. Specifically, I was at church last Sunday, and the style of "Holy Holy" that was sung was our favorite version, when Cindy and I could subtely swing our heads back and forth as the words, "in the nay - hame of the Lord" were sung.

Also last weekend, I happened to catch a late night broadcast of the movie, The Cutting Edge. Then I flipped the channel once it was done, and found Moneyball being played on another channel.

I miss my sister every day. So it's always fun when she sends me little reminders that she misses me too.

thoughts of summer fun

shared by Danny King, her childhood friend

VJ recently reminded me of one awesome summer day that must have been between Cyn's junior and senior year in high school. I'm not sure how we all ended up at my house, but we did. I had the house to myself for some reason and what does every high school kid naturally do with an empty house? House party of course!

I really wish I did remember, but I don't remember where we were coming from, but we all ended up in the pool in the early afternoon. Pool basketball, splashing, yelling, laughing, snacking on chips and salsa. Good times. It was a wild time in the pool and as high school kids reliably do, we were all making a mess but having good wholesome fun.

I remember when the afternoon was winding down and we were all getting hungry and heading to Sweet Tomatoes or Lyon's or something like that, Cyn got out of the pool and without a word about it, she was helping clean up the mess of towels and everything else that the group of ~10 of us had left all around. I think I remember her coming to me with a bunch of towels in her arms and asking where to put them. I hadn't even noticed that she had gathered them, but that was just how she was.

Always the matriarch of our groups and of our class. Always the caretaker. Always the leader. Always thinking a step ahead for everyone else's benefit. She was there having her fun with the group, but when it was time to go, before thinking of leaving, she was the only one who made sure everything was taken care of before we all left. Just thinking of her warmth and kindness makes me smile. I'm so thankful for our many years of friendship.

When I think about it, I'm pulled so hard in both directions for being upset and being so happy that I had the time I did, with her in junior high through college. So, I make a choice. I choose to hold on to the joy that her friendship brings me. I choose to be really REALLY happy that she colored my life with her shining example of being a warm and caring person, and to this day, she still gives me something to strive for. I am so thankful for all of the parts of Cyn that stay with me.

thoughts of pinay power

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Earlier this month, a friend from college passed away suddenly. Her name was Dawn Bohulano Mabalon. We were at UCLA together in the 90's and were both involved with the on-campus Filipino organizations there.

Dawn went on to become a History Professor at San Francisco State University; but more importantly, she became a mentor and inspiration for countless members of the Filipino/a community through her research, her teaching, her activism and just being her wonderfully fun-loving, brilliant self.

I don't remember whether Cindy ever had the chance to meet Dawn, but they truly remind me of one other. I'm fairly certain that Cindy knew who Dawn was, and that if they had had the chance to spend even a few moments together, they would have been big fans of each other. I'm confident that Dawn and Cindy are now becoming fast friends in heaven. #dawnmabalonisintheheart

thoughts of foil ball

shared by VJ Rabuy, her sister

Growing up, we lived in a cul de sac, and there were several families with young kids in our neighborhood. We would often all play outside... games like tag, kickball, and four square, to name a few. 

Another game that Cindy and I played, often just the two of us, was called “Foil Ball”. We didn’t have the experience or equipment to play baseball, so Cindy had invented Foil Ball as an alternative. We used a large wad of foil as the ball, closer to the size of a softball rather than a baseball.

We had a miniature, wooden, toy bat that was painted silver, and its handle was covered in some sort of black grip tape. The fun part about it was that the longer we played, the smaller our ball became. So whenever that happened, we would just apply more pieces of foil, until the ball become the right size again; then we would resume playing.

We used the manhole covers on the ground as home plate and second base, and estimated the distances for first and third. These days, when I occasionally park my car in front of our parents’ house, right by home plate, I think back to our childhood days and our good ol’ Foil Ball games.

thoughts of major league

shared by VJ Rabuy, her sister

My sisters and I are fans of the movie Major League. I once wanted to watch it just so I could count the number of times a cuss word was used.

At one point while we were growing up, Arlene wanted to own a copy of all baseball movies, and you could be sure that Major League was amongst them. I think it's safe to say it was the first R-rated movie that Cindy and I had ever watched.

There is a line used by the new owner lady during the early scenes of the movie, where she meets with the team's front office personnel as they review a list of prospects for the team meant to lose. Not only is the list full of washed up, undesirable players, it also contains at least one name of a player who was deceased.

The line goes something like...
Scout: “This guy’s dead.”
Boss lady: “Well cross him off then.”

This scene and favorite quote reminds me of a time when Cindy was just starting her term as the Financial Supports Commissioner (FSC) for the Associated Students of UCLA. She had been cleaning out the office as she was moving in, and found a half-filled box of old business cards for the previous FSC, Tyett Nguyen.

So I opened the box, took out a business card, grabbed my pen, drew a line through the previous FSC's name, and wrote "Cynthia Rabuy" above it.

As soon as Cindy saw that I made the old forgotten card useful once again, she kinda chuckled and was amused. At that instance I’m not sure who said it, but the words, “well cross him off then” were undoubtedly uttered.

thoughts of nailed it!

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Our family recently started watching the show Nailed It! on Netflix. It's a cooking competition show that challenges three inexperienced home chefs to compete against each other as they attempt to recreate an elaborate food creation, typically a dessert. The end results are disastrously wonderful.

As we were watching tonight, Andrew mentioned that the show reminded him of Cindy. After a moment of thought, I understood what he meant. Cindy really enjoyed baking, and she had a knack for picking up on things quickly. She would have enjoyed watching the contestants try to make something that was so above and beyond their ability. She would have also been quietly saying to herself, "I could probably do that."

Cindy would have been motivated to try making most of the items on the show on her own, just for fun. I can just picture her pulling out ingredients from the cupboards, just as the show ended, or running to the store to get any necessary additional ingredients. Or she might even sweet talk two of us to join her in an actual timed baking and decorating contest, just like those on the show.

So although she was probably too skilled in the kitchen to ever be on the show, we know she would have genuinely enjoyed watching it. Thinking of how Nailed It! would undoubtedly have made Cindy laugh, I have even more reason to enjoy it too.

thoughts of close-up

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Since the girls and I are on summer break, Andrew got some time off so we could take a family trip to the East Coast. We spent a few days in New York, and are currently enjoying the sites and history of Washington DC.

We've been to a few of the Smithsonian museums, the Washington Monument, and the Lincoln Memorial, to name a few. Our time in DC has made me think of Cindy, and what it was like for her when she took a school trip to DC as part of the "Close Up" program (during her eighth grade year, I think).

Although all my sisters and I had the option to participate in Close Up when it was our turn, Cindy was the only one of the five of us who did it. I admire her for her sense of adventure, willingness to try new things, and visit new places. It's also endearing to think that as our family takes photos at different landmarks, Cindy was doing the same thing not too long ago.

thoughts of word cookies

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Cindy loved board games, brain teasers, puzzles, and any opportunity to solve a problem. I'm proud to say that our family maintains that interest, and often enjoys a fun puzzle, sudoku, word jumble, or other type of game on a regular basis.

We only have a few games on our family's iPad, but one game that Ava and I play all the time is "Word Cookies". The game asks you to make different words out of a set of given letters. Cyn Cyn and Andrew join us occasionally too. We also have the game "Spell Tower" on our iPad; Andrew has it on his phone too. 

One of Cindy's favorite games was Boggle. We still have her original Boggle set, and usually bring it out during family game nights. Word Cookies and Spell Tower share a lot in common with Boggle; and all three remind me of Cindy.

thoughts of the holy spirit

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Last Sunday, Cyn Cyn received the gift of the Holy Spirit by celebrating her Confirmation. Our parish was doubly blessed because the Bishop was the mass celebrant, and it was also the Feast of Pentecost.

Just a few weeks ago, I happened to come across an old photo of Cindy's Confirmation too, held 22 years ago. She and her fellow candidates were also lucky enough to have the Bishop celebrate their mass.

I'm so grateful that Cyn Cyn has successfully completed the Confirmation process. It's reassuring to know that she'll not only have the Holy Spirit as a source of guidance throughout her life, but also her Tita Cyn and all our loved ones in heaven as well.

thoughts of more puppy love

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Last weekend, our family was in Reno for a volleyball tournament. It was the first time that we left our dog, Fiona, at home for more than a few hours. Fortunately, VJ was kind enough to stay at our house for the weekend to keep Fiona company. Arlene also came by during the day, to check on Fiona too.

Our daily life has definitely shifted a little since Fiona joined our family, as described in a previous post. But it's definitely for the better. We were all surprised how much we missed Fiona, while we were gone.

I'm grateful that my sisters were kind enough to make the time to watch Fiona. It made me feel a little guilty that I didn't contribute at all to taking care of the dogs we had while growing up, one of them being Cindy's dog, Nanook.

It makes me think that continuing to adapt our lives to having Fiona, is Cindy's subtle way of showing me how much a dog can add to your life. I can imagine her smiling (almost smirking) in heaven, as she sees her "non-dog sister" spending so much time with our dog today.

thoughts of U-C-L-A... fight...fight...fight!

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

While we were at UCLA, Cindy and I (along with Carla and Andrew) attended various sporting events. We were pretty spoiled by the fact that UCLA has such an outstanding college athletics program.

However, we didn't typically attend the more popular sports, like mens basketball or football; we actually ended up at more volleyball games or gymnastics meets. I've always been a gymnastics fan, and volleyball was the one sport that all five of us (Rabuy sisters) played in high school.

This past weekend, the UCLA womens gymnastics team won their 7th National Championship. It was a pretty exciting event, where UCLA was behind for most of the day and needed a 9.95 from its last competitor to win. That last routine earned a perfect 10, and the Bruins won!

I just happened to catch the last half hour of the event on TV. Watching it made me think of Cindy. Looking back at our college years, I really don't know how much she actually liked gymnastics. I wouldn't be surprised if maybe she just went to the meets because she knew I enjoyed them so much.

Either way, I'm happy to have those UCLA sports memories with my sister. Whenever the Bruins compete, I have even more reason to be both proud and sentimental.

thoughts of heartfelt memorials

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Fifteen years ago today, Cindy went to heaven. It's hard to believe it's been that long.

During our traditional family gathering in her remembrance, our parents brought a collage that was made up of the different newspaper articles and columns that were written when she passed away.

It's so heartwarming to be reminded of how Cindy's life touched so many people. We take a little extra time to think of her at this time of year, on her Heaven Anniversary; but we still miss her every single day.

thoughts of even more fun-filled madness

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

One of the most fun aspects of the month of March is enjoying the NCAA Mens Basketball Tournament. Previous posts have discussed our family's tradition of completing tournament brackets, predicting winners throughout the different rounds of games.

Since life seems to get busier every year, I recently had a fleeting moment when I considered not conducting our annual bracket competition. Thankfully, the moment passed, and we're still completing our brackets along with close friends and family.

March Madness always reminds me of Cindy. And as the first few days of the tournament have been especially unpredictable and entertaining, I'm so glad we've continued to keep our tradition alive. I hope everyone is enjoying the madness!!

thoughts of new blessings

shared by VJ Rabuy, her sister

I’m not sure when we started doing it, but when Cindy and I would get a new shirt, or dress, pair of pants, or other article of clothing as a gift, we would wear it to church first, before any other time we would wear it out.

In a way, it was as if we were blessing our new clothing item, being able to dab a little bit of holy water on it when signing the cross. It may have been something we had picked up from our dad.

Either way, it was a nice little ritual that I occasionally continue to practice; and it always reminds me of Cindy.

thoughts of a school dance

shared by AR Flanagan, her sister

Our high school used to host an international week event once a year. It was a week long, school wide activity that celebrated different cultures through performances and presentations.

I remember one international week when Cindy came home from school and attempted to demonstrate a Native American dance that had been performed that day. Unfortunately, she was rather unsuccessful in her dance efforts, and it made me laugh so hard!

So ever since then, whenever I hear music similar to what Cindy described for her demonstration, it puts a big smile on my face.

thoughts of sister-cousins

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

This weekend, our family has the joy of celebrating a "super sister-cousins baptismal weekend". Tomorrow, Ate Raisl's daughter, Abigail Rose, will be baptized in Concord, CA; on Sunday, Theresa's daughter, Penelope Rosario, will be baptized in Brooklyn, New York.

Carla and I have the honor of being godmothers to Abigail, while Cyn Cyn was honored to be chosen as a godmother to Penelope. We decided to have Cyn Cyn make the weekend trip to New York. I am certain that Cindy and Zoe, our sister-cousins in heaven, had a hand in ensuring that family members could attend both baptisms.

Cyn Cyn travelled with Leland on Thursday. The arrangements for their flights and the trip itself both went incredibly smoothly. Although a good amount of luck and timing was involved, I know that Cindy and Zoe were watching over them - and all our family members - as they travelled.

We're thrilled to have Abigail and Penelope continue to expand our family, and are excited to have them continue our heartwarming sister-cousins family tradition.

thoughts of eggs in her ear

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

For Christmas, Arlene gave the girls a few adorable Scump items, including a coin purse, key holder, ring, key chain, magnet and lanyard. For those unfamiliar with Scrump, she's Lilo's homemade doll from the movie Lilo and Stitch.

Cindy had a Scump doll that is one of our most cherished possessions, included in the photo below, and described in this previous post. It's so sweet to see the girls have an affection for Scump as well, knowing and feeling that it's yet another connection to their Tita Cyn.

thoughts of making a wish

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister

Happy new year! The holidays are always bittersweet, enjoying time with family, but also missing Cindy and other dearly departed loved ones.

As mentioned in the previous post, we were happy to share in a cousins' gathering for Cindy's birthday. There were around 20-25 us in our little house and we all sang "Happy Birthday Cindy!" while the kids blew out the candles.

Just wanted to share another photo, this time of the candles. Photo credit to my cousin Adam who was visiting from the Philippines.