Tuesday, December 22, 2015

thoughts of seasons of love

shared by Marlo R. Beall, her sister
Happy 36th Birthday Cyn!
In celebration of Cindy's birthday, our family got together to have pizza, share ice cream cake and play board games, all things Cindy enjoyed doing. We even took the time to sing "Happy Birthday Cindy/Tita Cyn", before cutting into the cake.

It was heartwarming to hear our girls saying that they were excited for Tita Cyn's party tonight, as they went about cleaning their room and tidying up the house (also traditional activities for Cindy's birthday). I'm so glad that we've taken the time to keep Cindy's memory alive for her nieces, even though none of them had a chance to meet her.

Cindy's birthday and her Heaven Anniversary are such bittersweet occasions. It's joyful to make an extra effort to remember Cyn, but painful to feel that it would be so much better if she were still here with us.

With Cindy's birthday coinciding with the holidays, it's natural to reflect upon events of the previous year as we look forward to the new year ahead. For our family, this has been a year of engagements, and celebrations of love.

During the past twelve months, four cousins celebrated their engagement. On the Rabuy side, Jayne and Lawrence became engaged in June, Theresa and Josh in October, and Joyce and Sean in November. On the Pesigan side, Angela and Josh became engaged in December 2014.

In addition to the exciting engagements, Michael and Megan were married in May of this year, and Arlene and Shawn will be married in April 2016. Congratulations and best wishes to all of these beautiful couples!

A couple of weeks ago, Theresa and I exchanged emails about some general wedding planning. It's so exciting to have so many family weddings to look forward to in the near future.

After hitting send on my reply email, I had a brief moment of truly missing Cindy, and I unexpectedly found myself weeping, just bawling uncontrollably for a few minutes. Amidst all the moments of joyful excitement for my cousins entering their new stages in life, there were also instances of sadness, just knowing that Cindy, as well as Zoe, are not present to celebrate with us.

Once I wiped away my tears, finished blowing my nose, and took a few deep breaths, I went about the rest of my morning - washing dishes while listening to Pandora. The first song that played on my "Wicked (the musical) station" was Seasons of Love from Rent.

I knew that was Cindy's way of telling me to embrace both the joy and the sadness, and of reminding me that she was still celebrating with us, although she was not physically here. She's always had impeccable timing when it comes to friendly reminders.

As the song continued to play, I looked out the window and saw the red and golden colored leaves falling from the tree across the street, blowing briefly in the wind, and landing softly on the ground. I knew it was yet another reminder sent from above, about welcoming the change that life brings, and to continue to celebrate life's significant moments, both big and small.

2 comments:

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  2. Thanks for sharing. I haven't been here in awhile so it was nice to catch up. Hope you and the family are doing well. Happy B-Day Cyn!

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